Most people are not aware that before Eve (Chava), Adam had a wife called Lilith

Many are familiar with the biblical account that Adam’s only wife was Eve.

However, the Zohar hint at a different narrative—a tale obscured through time. Before Eve, there existed another woman, hinted at in biblical verses yet often overlooked by students.§

Known as the mother or queen of demons, this woman was named Lilith, also known as the Plonit in Hebrew writings. This is a name that should not be spoken out loud because when you say someone else’s name, you show endearment, such as when we mention the names of Hashem many times in prayer. But we want her as far away as possible.

Either way, Lilith’s story transcends simple myth. She is associated with dark deeds, from the tragic fate of drowned children to nocturnal liaisons with men, veiled in moral ambiguity and supernatural intrigue. There is however nothing to romanticize her for.

We do not say the name Lilith out loud

Rabbi Chanina cautioned against the peril of sleeping alone at night, warning that those who do so risk encountering Plonit—a figure associated with lust, sexual perversion, and infidelity. This caution persists in contemporary customs, where people sleeping alone are advised to ensure light enters their room until they sleep, as a safeguard against Plonit’s influence, which should not be underestimated.

We will divide our exploration into three parts:

1. The Meaning of Plonit’s Name
2. Sexual energy in Kabbalah
3. Practical Tips for Protection

These teachings may seem mythological, yet they encompass profound concepts relevant to our everyday living, if you are trying to come closer to Hashem by increasing holiness.

Meaning and origin of this name

The name Lilith is pronounced as לילית which shares the root of the word to מילל (to mourn or lament). As such, this is a figure associated with sadness and complaints. This unhealthy lack of satisfaction and constant mourning over life is what characterizes Lilith and what brings her closer to a person.

Alternatively, it could stem from “layla,” meaning night, hinting at its association with darkness and the nocturnal realm where she most exerts influence.

Her name and origins, a figure resonating through various cultural and biblical sources, reveal profound insights into ancient beliefs and metaphysical concepts.

The name “Plonit” finds echoes in Mesopotamian and Sumerian texts, often spelled similarly with an ‘U’ at the end, hinting at a shared cultural resonance across civilizations.

In the biblical context, Plonit is alluded to in Isaiah 34:14 amidst prophetic imagery, where it symbolizes a creature amidst desolation. Interpretations vary, with some attributing the name to a specific animal and others seeing it as a metaphor for malevolent forces inhabiting ruined places.

Moving beyond etymology, the concept of Plonit extends into Midrashic interpretations of biblical texts, particularly in Bereshit. The Midrash Bereshit Rabbah suggests that before Eve, Adam had a first companion, formed while he was conscious.

This first woman, often identified as Lilith, was rejected by Adam due to her supernatural and earthly aspects. She was born with higher strength and judgment (gevurah) and thus was very dominating, prompting her to fight with Adam over rulership. Adam spoke one of the holy names of God and killed her. Then God created Chava (Eve) from Adam’s rib during his sleep—a process symbolizing a deeper spiritual and physical union.

The creation of Eve, “built” from Adam’s rib, not only implies a physical construction but also imbues her with a spiritual essence, linking her to the Kabbalistic concept of Binah, representing the higher, supernatural realm. This dual creation—physical and spiritual—reflects a profound union beyond mere material existence.

The Arizal explains that this is why Adam said “This one is bone of my bones, flesh from flesh. The first one was as hard as a bone, the second one, soft as flesh.

But Lilith was not content with just dying and claimed to Hashem that her death was unfair and that she should still retain dominance over some aspect of Creation. Hashem then gave her rulership over demons together with her husband, the inciting angel Sa-tan.

Sexual energy comes from Chokhmah

The greater the desire, the greater its source and the greater the potential for danger. It’s not difficult to see why we have many fences around sexuality. The sages already taught us that wherever you see a fence (גדר) there you find holiness.

A lot of people seek spiritual experiences, but not everyone is aware that this requires subsuming sexual desire and making it go up the spine toward the brain and fuel it. Since our consciousness is constantly oscillating between the physical and spiritual reality, one of the things that grounds a person most in this world is precisely the sexual pleasure, which is the greatest one can experience (in the purely physical world).

Either way, the consequences of misdirected sexual energy, as seen through biblical narratives and Midrashic interpretations, highlight profound insights into human relationships and spiritual fulfillment. In Mussar language from the Mesilat Yesharim, this is called Perishut (separation).

In the biblical account of Amnon and Tamar, the story unfolds with Amnon’s initial attraction to Tamar, his sister. However, after their encounter, the narrative shifts dramatically. Despite his initial intense feelings, Amnon’s subsequent emotions turn to hatred and rejection, showing how untamed desire can lead a person to his downfall.

Similarly, the Midrashic tale of Adam and his first companion reflects on the consequences of purely earthly unions. Lilith, rejected for her supernatural and material origins, becomes symbolic of a spiritual disconnection that manifests in destructive behaviors and tendencies. This Midrash serves as a metaphor for the pitfalls of indulging solely in material and carnal desires, rather than seeking a holistic union that integrates both physical and spiritual dimensions.

Therefore, the management of sexual energy plays a crucial role in personal and spiritual growth. According to the Arizal, the best time for couples to engage in it is in the night of Shabbat, after midnight. This is because that’s the time the couple can effect the highest possible union in the upper worlds, and also create new levushim (vestments) that they will be using in Gan Eden.

On a basic level, engaging in sexual activities with an intention to both give and receive love—embodying “ratzon latet,” the will to give—aligns with the higher spiritual principles. This contrasts with purely self-serving motivations (“lekabel”), which focus solely on personal gratification without regard for spiritual elevation or mutual fulfillment.

Therefore, couples should be determined to focus on nurturing stable, committed relationships built on both physical and spiritual dimensions, as stated in Halacha. In Jewish tradition, intimate relationships are holy and bring peace in the home besides inviting in the Shekhina.

The huntress

In Midrashic literature, Lilith appears in various contexts, often associated with themes of temptation and spiritual danger. For instance, in the Alphabet of Ben Sira, Lilith is portrayed as a seductress who preys on men, particularly during the night, symbolizing nocturnal emissions and sexual fantasies. This characterization underscores her association with sexual temptation and the darker impulses of human desire.

From these interpretations, several spiritual lessons emerge. Lilith serves as a cautionary tale about the consequences of unchecked desires and the importance of balancing physical and spiritual elements in a couple’s relationship. The Zohar teaches that Lilith collects the drops of semen that fall out of men, whether conscious or not, and impregnates herself to create demons since her mate, the angel Samekh Tet, is an eunuch and can’t procreate.

The human soul

Our soul, inherently divine and altruistic, transforms our relationships into opportunities not only to receive but also to give—a concept deeply intertwined with fostering positive connections.

Psalm 19 holds a unique power to dispel negative sexual energies. By counting every 51 letters within Psalm 19, one will encounter the name of Lilith. The significance of 51 lies in its numerical value, “na,” which translates to “please.” This invokes the plea found in prayers like “el na refa na la,” asking for healing that Moshe Rabbenu did to cure Miriam from Tzara’at.

Psalm 19 serves as a petition to ward off destructive forces, which can profoundly impact individuals, leading to psychological and emotional distress. It addresses the pervasive damage caused by abuses, depression, loneliness, and disconnection from both oneself and the divine.

Utilize it daily if you must, together with Tikkun HaKlali, reciting it with intention to protect yourself from these negative influences.

With these four practical tips and their explanations, I invite you to reflect:

• Which of these tips resonates with you the most?
• How will you commit, alongside our community, to fostering positive change within our societies on this issue?

Let’s work together to integrate these principles into our lives, promoting spiritual and emotional well-being while combating negative influences. Together, we can make a meaningful difference.